Countdown to 2015 – 2 – Into the Dreamy Depths

I think it’s time to specifically call out the unconscious part of ourselves too and why we have it and what we can do with it. So as the countdown to 2015 nears its end, let’s take a look at what’s going on inside.

“Who looks outside dreams, who looks inside awakens.” ~ Carl Jung

I think this is true and I think both are important as well as integrated. The unconscious is the part of the iceberg immersed in the ocean…the unseen, the feelings and emotions, the intangible. If you’ve ever had a gut feeling, woke up from a dream or had butterflies in your chest from falling in love, you’ve experienced the unconscious.

I’m going to write from a Jungian perspective because it is familiar territory and it resonates with me deeply. Jung identified both the collective unconscious and the personal unconscious.

The collective unconscious refers to the human template basically, what are the things the characteristics that all of us receive when we’re born, share with each other and contribute to in how we live our lives. The ability to think, feel, to breathe, our unique ability to analyze and be aware of ourselves as individuals and aware of our thoughts.

The personal unconscious refers to our unique experience of the collective unconscious. It is the culmination of our experiences, the influence of various cultures and communities we are born into, the season and time of day we first experience and the impact of all of this and more on how we individually express and manifest it all.

I think we can all agree that we are not just these static bodies made up of all this physical, tangible stuff and nothing more. Where does the change take place…not physical changes, but how we change as people over time? Where do our experiences go as we accumulate more of them? Where does the growth we experience in our lives occur, the learning? How do we evolve and apply ourselves and express ourselves? Where does creativity live? What does our conscience look like and how does it operate? Why do we seek new experiences and goals and dreams?

And so there is much we can learn if we are willing to dive into the depths of the intangible world within…we might call it our souls. What would it look like to acknowledge this and engage with this energy?

How do we do that? A number of ways.

The realm of the unconscious is that of symbols, where it plays around with ways to express itself and work its way into our consciousness. Symbols are containers for energy, meaning, information, values, emotions. They give us something physical and tangible to identify with so that we can then process all these unknowns with what we do know.

This is why storytelling is important and why we have cultural myths. This is what we experience in dreams. This is one way that nature is a mirror for us. This is something we can find in our own writing and art if we commit to a practice and then experience ourselves through our own creations.

Initially I wrote a whole section on dream work for this post, but there is just too much information there and if you’re like me, you get a bit antsy when a blog post just won’t end even if it is interesting. So expect a post on dream work sometime soon. (Follow this blog and you’ll get an email when it comes.)

For now, my recommendation would be to get curious about your unconscious world and search for some practices that most appeal to you for getting to know it.

Maybe it is sitting with some of the questions above. Maybe it is starting to journal, take nature walks, meditate, record dreams, read poetry or philosophy or a book about Carl Jung. If at all possible I think a long term, solo journey in nature is the most ideal way to dive into this stuff.

Might I suggest some topics to consider:

“Who am I?” ok maybe that is a bit intense. But what makes me, me? My values, qualities, talents, passions, personality?

How do I process information?

How do I express myself?

How do I want others to approach me?

What are my shadow qualities?

What triggers challenging emotions in me? How do I handle that when it happens?

When do I feel the happiest and most alive?

What was my childhood like?…both the things I loved to do for hours and also my defense mechanisms and strategies that I used as I discovered I was my own person?

What do I need to let go of in my life that doesn’t serve me anymore to make space for new?

What new things do I want to invite into that space?

..all territory of the unconscious and the soul.

To me, not befriending your unconscious is like not celebrating your birthday. Your unconscious is there and it is active whether you like it or not and it has a critical role to play. We all have the opportunity to get on board with that and have a conscious approach towards it and actually be grateful for the gifts that lie there. When we don’t, what resides there can often arise in ways that aren’t so comfortable.

“You can close your eyes to the things you don’t want to see, but you can’t close your heart to the things you don’t want to feel.” ~ Johnny Depp

With our birthdays, we’re turning older whether we like it or not. Aging is a reality. Celebrating your birthday is an opportunity to celebrate your life…holy shit, we’re alive! That’s pretty cool. To me, a birthday is a symbol of our life and an opportunity to check in with what we’re doing with it.

Ok, off my soap box. Happy birthday to everyone and happy exploring of your unconscious. This is just the tiniest of introductions to all things unconscious, but my hope is it was interesting in the least and a call to curiosity and action at the most.

Thank you for tuning in to this series of ten blogs posts on personal development practices for a fulfilling 2015. If you’re just arriving, welcome! Here’s where we’ve been:

10 – Setting Intentions

9 – Expressing Gratitude

8 – Wandering in Nature

7 – Playing with our Passions

6 – Letting to go Excuses

5 – Law of Attraction and Ritual

4 – Self Care

3 – Finding your People

If you like what you are reading, please consider backing my kickstarter.com called: Let’s Go on an Adventure! and please share too. The campaign is focused on writing and publishing a book about my transformative adventure from Corporate America to a life designed around passions and also includes an interactive guidebook to help those wishing to make their own personal changes.

I have 2 days left in my campaign, all or nothing! I will beg. I will. Please.

You can read more about my story at erinkmac.com and continue to receive this blogs by clicking the ‘follow’ button.

Thank so very much for coming along on this adventure.

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Countdown to 2015 – 5 – Ritual Attraction

So the official countdown to 2015 is actually tonight I suppose with it being NYE, so let’s continue with this countdown to a transformative adventurous 2015 as well. Taking a look at the countdown so far, an ideal way to spend this transitional day/night would be a combination of it all:

10 – Setting Intentions

9 – Expressing Gratitude

8 – Wandering in Nature

7 – Playing with our Passions

6 – Letting to go Excuses

Add some champagne and midnight kisses and that’s a pretty dreamy New Year’s Eve for me. I’m celebrating in Argentina where apparently you are supposed to wear pink underwear and then be sure that your first step of 2015 is with your right foot…ya know, “putting the right foot forward” as they say.

While I may not have a prince charming to kiss tonight, I do have the champagne, pink panties and a right foot. It seems an appropriate time to talk about ritual and attraction…the Law of Attraction that is.

So the Law of Attraction is of course about attracting what you want in your life by focusing your thoughts and energy on that very thing. The idea is that we are all energy as is this beautiful planet we live on and we are all connected by that energy. Quantum physics supports, hell it proves, this idea. We are all part of a greater whole; the connection is magnetic; like will attract like.

“What you seek is seeking you.” ~ Rumi

Also, putting your focus on something keeps your awareness there and you are often more receptive to relevant things that show up. Your brain loves what is familiar. It’s purpose is to be efficient and to recall patterns and run the appropriate response circuits. With intention and awareness, you can influence what those circuits are…letting go of old ones and replacing them with new ones.

“We do not see things as they are. We see things as we are.” ~ Anais Nin

This isn’t a free pass, you have to show up. You have to be clear on what you are inviting in and why; what is the greater purpose?

Being able to see things from the ‘big picture’ point of view is essential here. Disbelievers will point to the occasions when they wanted to attract something and didn’t. Often this is because they have focused not only on what they wish to attract, but also exactly how they expect it to play out or perhaps they are isolating their desire.

“I want to win the lottery. I didn’t win the lottery. It didn’t work.”

ummm, no.

Another way to look at it would be something like this, to use myself as an example:

“I want to have the financial resources necessary to write and publish my book.”

This focuses on the financial desire while honoring the greater good and creating openness for how it will happen.

The Law of Attraction is not limited to thought and intention though, it is also action. Almost like the universe is saying, “You want that? Prove it.”

Again in the case of my personal example, one action I am currently taking to influence my financial situation and the publishing of my book is to run a kickstarter campaign to try to crowd-fund my project.

It may work out…I hope it does and I am trying to take action to influence that as well (writing articles, posting blogs, sharing photography, emailing and posting on facebook, etc.) or it may not. If it doesn’t, something else will. That actually is a guarantee.

“When you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.” ~Pablo Cuelho

I think it is important to understand the ‘why’ of what will manifest and what will not manifest, as well as the time factor. I have a few opinions on that.

One goes back to everything being connected and us being a world community. We are part of an intricate puzzle that needs to energetically fit together and so I think it is best to be a collaborative community where we all support each other in this. (side note: I think this is a very abundant and creative energy that is available to us all)

Also, there may be something that we need to learn first, someone we need to meet, an experience we need to have before it makes sense for us to receive what we are wishing to attract. “The Law” works, just not always on our timeframe.

Finally, we may wish for a lot of things and some may cancel each other out or compete with each other, even if we are unaware of that in the present moment. We can help our deepest desires along the more focused we are on being intentional about what we want for our lives and why, including what we want to give and share.

On the levels of quantum physics, neuroscience, mindfulness and spirituality…it works.

“What you think, you become. What you feel, you attract. What you imagine, you create.” ~ Buddha

One way I like to participate in the Law of Attraction is by way of ritual. I do rituals at key milestones in my life, which always includes one around the turn of the new year. (Notice that I said “around the turn…” meaning that if you do not do one today it is not a reason to write it off and wait until next year.)

Everything we’ve done so far in this series of blogs has set us up to have a good idea of what we want to attract in our lives and in the coming year. A ritual to honor these things and to focus on energetically and symbolically drawing attention to them will help our desires to manifest.

This can be as simple or as intricate as feels good to you. Creativity is most definitely invited to this party.

I think the topic of ritual could be its own blog post, there is celebrating to get to today and perhaps you have a pair of pink panties to buy…so that is it for now.

This post is the sixth in a series of ten posts counting down to a meaningful, inspired 2015. If you like what you are reading, please consider backing my kickstarter.com called: Let’s Go on an Adventure! and please share too.

The campaign is focused on writing and publishing a book about my transformative adventure from Corporate America to a life designed around passions and also includes an interactive guidebook to help those wishing to make their own personal changes.

I have 5 days left in my campaign, all or nothing!

You can read more about my story at erinkmac.com and continue to receive this blogs by clicking the ‘follow’ button.

Thank so very much for coming along on this adventure.

Countdown to 2015 – 6 – Excuses be damned!

The countdown to 2015 continues. For our next trick, let’s send our excuses straight to the place where the sun don’t shine. So by now we’ve started thinking about our intentions for what we want 2015 to look like, answering questions and dreaming big. We’ve focused on gratitude, acknowledging how important it is to recognize what we do have. We took all of these thoughts and good energy for a wander in nature and then we took our passions out to play.

It’s not necessarily a linear process, but all things that we can take together to shake it up and get ready for a new year. Do you notice that contemplating our passions often tends to coincide with excuses and obstacles for why we can’t pursue them?

“I would if I could…”

“I’d love to, if only…”

“I don’t know how…”

“I’ll do it when…”

“…but…”

I’m the most guilty of saying, “Well I would, but I don’t have the money now.” Until one day it occurred to me that I didn’t even know how much money it would take to do the thing I was saying I couldn’t afford.

Maybe it is true that I didn’t have the money in that moment and I could choose to give up there and stay stuck. Instead, I now scribble that information onto the “Known” list. I take a look at what else I know to be true and then I start to figure out all of the unknowns. In this example, how much money would it take to do x?

I think there is a lot of information hidden in our excuses. We may even believe they are logical ‘reasons’.

They often point to where we feel scarcity in our lives…

Not having enough money

Not knowing what it is we want to do

Not having the resources, knowledge…and you knew this was coming…not having the time.

“I don’t have time is the grown up version of the dog ate my homework.” ~ Unknown

or they point to where we feel responsibility in our lives…

I have a mortgage.

I have a job, benefits, tenure, etc.

I have debt.

I have kids, family and relationships to tend to.

Responsibilities are legitimate things, absolutely. They also point to the outcomes of previous decisions we’ve made in our lives, again giving us information about our values, desires, habits, choices, resources and circumstances.

How you spend your time, money and energy is indicative of both your priorities and your responsibilities.

“We either make ourselves miserable or we make ourselves happy, the amount work is the same.” ~ Carlos Castaneda

What comes next is a lot of good news for you if you’re willing to get into a staring contest with your excuses.

If you want something, it is almost always possible and doable. This has been a huge lesson for me the last two years and then I’ve had it demonstrated to me over and over again.

You just need to decide how much you want it, get curious and prioritize accordingly.

“Forget all of the reasons it won’t work and believe the one reason it will.” ~ Unknown

“yeah, but…”

shhhhh…

“no really though…”

zip it. 

It doesn’t mean you will not have to take risks or give things up or make changes…all challenging things to do and ultimately all reasons why it can be more comfortable to blame the excuse rather than do something about it. AND…it’s all worth it to go after what you really want in life.

Here is the challenge and the opportunity to get your head and your heart working together instead of playing tug-o-war…

Excuses be damned. If you could do anything in the world with your life, what would you most want to do, as you see it now?

Whatever your answer, do you really mean it?

What is stopping you? (If nothing, than awesome. Share your experience in the comments!)

What do you know to be true? What are the unknowns?

Are you going after it? What are you discovering?

Are you not going after it? Why not? What’s in your way?

What’s really in your way?

How could you approach it differently?

What have you tried to do about it and what happened?

Now what?

What is a different way to look at it? This is an invitation to get creative and unconventional. Find out what it would actually take and then start figuring out the path to get there…knowing the path is sometimes a puzzle and sometimes a paved highway.

I have met parents with kids who are traveling and living in other parts of the world.

I have met artists who are using their final pennies to pursue their craft while waiting to get into school…and opportunities are showing up.

I have met dreamers with ideas who are engaging in entrepreneurial pursuits on the side of their jobs until they can make the transition.

I have met healers who are trading their talents in exchange for services when money is not yet there.

I have met adventurers and I myself have invited in and accepted the generosity of others knowing full well that we will give it back tenfold when we are able.

This is intended as an invitation. This is meant to be exciting and freeing.

“If it is important to you, you’ll find a way. If not, you’ll find an excuse.” ~ Unknown

It took two years from the time I had the inkling to follow a dream and the time I worked my way through shifting priorities and refocusing the circumstances from past decisions. For me this meant deciding to sell my house and my car in order to free myself of attachments and financial responsibilities before coming to Argentina.

I did it. It worked. It’s a practice…this whole “excuses be damned!” thing and I continue to be dedicated to it. I’m hoping to help inspire others to do the same through the book and interactive guidebook I am now writing.

If you like what you’re reading, please consider backing my kickstarter campaign for this project called, “Let’s Go on an Adventure!”. Also please share my campaign with others who might be inspired.

I have 6 days left in my campaign when I will get all funding if I reach my goal and nothing if I don’t. Any donation helps!

This is number 6 in a series of 10 personal development blogs counting down to 2015, in hopes of inspiring an adventurous, fulfilling year ahead. Follow this blog to receive the others in this series and check out more of my story at erinkmac.com.

Thank you for tuning in!

You Can’t Change Without Changing

You can’t change without changing. Now that seems a bit obvious. I started using this phrase with clients though because I was discovering a phenomenon of sorts. The desire to change was there, or sometimes even just the realization of the necessity to change and yet they were stuck. I started witnessing this with friends in their personal lives as well. But really, let’s be honest. I started noticing this in me.

“Oh that’s not how we do things here.”

“That’s not me.”

“I can’t do that.”

“I don’t know how.”

“I would if I could.”

“It’s not working.”

It is natural to want to start making changes slowly and subtly while still hanging on to the comfort of what we know even if it is the very comfort that we wish to leave. The brain is an efficient organ that survives on recognizing familiar situations and putting the familiar responding circuit into action. Therefore, it actually experiences something new as a threat, or in the very least, something what it is: new! A new response is called for and this is outside of the majority of the tasks that the brain performs. Remember that we also have brain cells in our heart and our gut, which can explain the pangs of knowing that we get when you can “feel it in your gut” or your “heart is telling you to do something.” It really is a full body experience to change. So we need to break these old circuits to create something new, if you want to look at it from a neuroscience perspective.

I also like to look at it from a more emotional and/or spiritual perspective, and that is to say that we have to create the space for change…sometimes literally, sometimes emotionally, sometimes in our minds. At a minimum we need the space in our awareness.

personal example:

Stuckness: I have been dreaming and planning a move abroad, and I am ready, but I have this house and a mortgage. It would be great if the house could be a form of savings for me. It won’t rent for enough money; it won’t sell. This has been going on for months and months. I am stuck.

Letting go: The house represents my ego and my old way of being and is keeping me anchored to my old life. For what I am about to do, it is best for me to let it go and sell it. What do I need to do to get this house sold? Who can help me? It is possible. (and it was)

Now this is a personal example and I’m just giving the minimal details. It took me a lot of work to decide that was the right decision for me. As I sat and cried while writing out the check for the amount of money I lost. I thought, “Am I absolutely crazy? No, I just believe in my dream this much and I am taking the leap.” And imagine how tough it was one year later to hear of friends buying and selling houses within hours. When I tell people I meet here in Argentina, “I sold my house and moved abroad,” they often say something along the lines of “That’s incredible, but I just don’t understand why you sold your house??” I don’t know the Spanish yet for how to say, “Great question! Well, it represented my ego, my old way of living, an old failed relationship and I was ready to let go and create space for new!”

So a few simple thoughts to help trigger the unsticking process:

Play the “what would it look like” game. Let yourself dream and create a vision. When you make the change, what will it look like? What will it feel like? What will you be doing and how will your situation and people around you respond? How will you know when you are there?

Then look at what is standing in your way. What is in your control and what is out of your control? Be honest about this. Great news! You can’t change something out of your control so you can cross those items off of your ‘to do’ or ‘to worry about’ list. Rather, look at any road blocks and barriers you see and focus on how you can navigate them. Sometimes you can break them right down. Sometimes it involves much more work and you might even feel you are getting away from the original point. Go back to your vision exercises. Don’t try to skirt road blocks; they’ll show up again. That’s a promise.

“Nothing ever goes away until it teaches us what we need to know” – Pema.

When taking the leap, acknowledge the role in your life that the state you are leaving has played. Creating space for new can often feel like a mini death of sorts. It is important to acknowledge what was good, what you can take with you and to grieve the loss.

Reach out to others for help.

Be honest with yourself.

Now jump.

I like to use the analogy that I had to use to try skydiving for the first time. Just jump out of the plane and then let the rest happen…let the view zoom by, let the parachute do its job and trust that it will, enjoy the float back to solid ground. You have to let go though. Now I’m not saying we should just run and jump out of a plane the second we realize we want a change. Rather, letting go and fully saying yes to the change is often the last part, the hardest part and what can keep us stuck. So get yourself ready, jump and enjoy the ride.

This can apply to tangible situations like I described for myself (selling a house), but also to growing yourself as a person, relationships and other less tangible transformations.